You know how they always say that there’s somebody out there for you? Yeah, I never really believed it.
But then something changed.
You see, I’ve always been attracted to ‘empty’ people. Like, awful people. Plus, I always ended heartbroken because, of course, they gave me the worst treat. After 3 or 5 heartbreaks, I was actually giving up on love. You know, I began to believe there was nobody out there for me.
And then I met her.
She literally came to me in the eye of the storm. I had the most awful week of my life and the next week I met her.
Let me describe how the thing went:
So, ‘X’ stands for me and ‘M’ stands for her.
*Wednesday after math class*
X- *sees her and pulls her close by the arm* How did your math grade go?
M- *looks at me kinda creeped out* I got a good one. How about you?
X- Oh… *looks down in shame*
M- Oh! You see?
Yeah, I know what you’re thinking. “That was it?” Or you’re probably laughing because you may think I’m a stalker or whatever.
BUT when she said “Oh! You see?” (which, by the way, she said kinda mocking/scolding) she smiled at me…
And I knew I was lost :)
Because, honestly, if you saw her smiling you’d be lost too!
It is the kind of smile that makes you think everything is okay. It gives you that warm feeling.
The next day I saw her again of course and I tried to talk to her once more. The only problem was that I didn’t really know what I was supposed to say to her. But the odds were in my favour!
So, there was a girl with a panda beanie. And then I thought “Oh, the panda would look so good on her!” (I know I’m a moron, please don’t point it out.) So I tried to get her to put the panda beanie on, but I faIled of course. And I told her “But you’d look so adorable with it!
Yes, of course she looked at me as if I was insane. BUT the same day, in the afternoon, I talked to her on facebook and sent her a link about how to make your own panda beanie. I honestly thought I was not gonna get a reply. But I did!
After that, we just kept talking more and more. And somewhere in between a good talk and lots of good laughs… I fell for her.
At first, it was scary how much time I spent thinking about her. I didn’t want to fall again for someone who was not feeling the same way about me.
But I was lucky enough to witness a miracle…
Almost 2 months after we started talking, she confessed something that changed my whole life…
"I really like you."
I was really shocked when she said that. And after a while of not knowing what to say, I said the same to her.
On that day I went home with this overwhelming happiness. I actually could not believe it.
Elapsed a month, I finally got the nerve to ask her a question…"Do you want to be my girlfriend?"
She said yes and that was the happiest day of my whole life.
From that day on, I’ve been really happy and I’ve been able to make her happy.
It’s not been easy, but it’s been worth it.
Yes, we fight. And yes, we’ve made each other cry. But we’ve mended our mistakes.
She sees something in me that I can’t see. And I am so thankful for that.
When I am down she picks me up, when I cry she wipes my tears, when I feel lost she finds me.
And that’s why I love you.
Saoirse Ronan - Susie Salmon (The Lovely Bones)
Carey Mulligan on her choice for best performance of the decade: Saoirse Ronan as Briony Tallis in Atonement.
Saoirse Ronan talks The Host at TIFF [x]